Monday, November 9, 2009

Heartbreak at the Coffee Shop

I am in a very awkward situation right now. It's tearing me up.

I have an hour and a half to kill between my haircut and my book club, so I set up camp at the corner table in It's a Grind. I just sat down to enjoy my Praline Latte and am working on setting up my new computer when I notice the man and woman in the chairs beside me. They are very clearly arguing. Within a minute, it is obvious what they are talking about.

They are (not at all discreetly, mind you) trying to negotiate who gets what in their divorce. They're arguing about the house, the cars, the pet, the appliances - everything. It's awful. It's uncomfortable for me, but I can't help hearing them. I feel like I'm intruding on a very personal and devastating conversation.

The part where I almost start crying, though, is when they start arguing about what they will tell their kids. Obviously the kids are small.
"We'll just tell them daddy and mommy made a big mistake and should never have gotten married. That we'll be living separately now."
I know I'm still a newlywed and all, but I can't stop obsessing about how a couple gets from their wedding day to this point. How does it happen?? Chris and I have talked about how we can never EVER allow divorce to be an option. Ever. We cannot even allow ourselves to consider it for a second. Because the second we indulge the thought, even to write it off, it begins to take root.

I don't know anything about this couple. I don't know what circumstances lead them to this point. What I do know, though, is that my heart is hurting for them, and especially for their kids.

3 comments:

Chuck Guth said...

You know I am glad you and Chris have that agreement. It is one you must stand by no matter what. When my ex-wife and I separated we did not follow that however we did decide to do everything with our daughter in mind. We have stayed friends and even celebrate holidays together...it is a little dysfunctional but our motto is we put the FUN in dysfunctional. As a result our daughter knows that we are still a team and things have worked out well over the past 10 years. When Karen and I married we agreed to the same agreement you and Chris have...it is important.

KelseyElizabeth said...

That really is sad. Especially when kids are involved.
When I was 11 my parents sat us down and told us that they were getting a divorce...and my mom was getting re-married to a family friend...in the SAME conversation. Tough times. That's why I don't care if I am 50 when I get married...gonna wait until I get it right! :)

Becky said...

Kelsey, that must have been awful. Especially at 11.

Believe me, the right man is worth the wait.